真的很努力

went to menjenguk old tuition teachers today. Went menjenguk Alex(my add maths teacher) and also Pn Chaw(Chinese teacher) . I found it great to see them again. Its been quite some time since i last seen them and be with them. Thus, i surely felt rather like at 'home' or in other words in my element. haha..

Alex is fine and like chat chat with tat Big guy for a while .btw..i bought Swiss rolls for the teachers!!! thank you all ar..!!....bt when i went to visit Pn Chaw..the emotions began rolling. I did not get an A for my Chinese. To be honest, i felt proud of myself..greatly satisfied as what i deeply know in my heart is to satisfied and grateful. I should not be greedy but i felt that i disappointed Pn Chaw in some way. I really worked hard for it..maybe its not enough.

i am not very interested in Chinese unlike some others but i do not like hate it. I still remember yesterday when Calvin phoned Pn Chaw to tell her that he got an A1 for Chinese...i felt the elation. haiz....when it was my turn to speak..i told her that i was satisfied...(that was what i really felt) but i kinda feel that i disappointed Pn Chaw. haiz...and when Zhi Cong told Pn Chaw :"其实友盛真的很努力......" , my feelings were mixed. I really felt a stir of emotions. i really amde an effort memorizing chinese essays and did some research, but it was not enough .it was like a raw feeling. I felt that i have let down Pn Chaw. And at the same time i really thank Lord that i have great friends such as Zhi Cong..who is always honest and stays true to me.

could i have done better?? If only i tried better maybe...haiz...I am really grateful getting B3 but knowing that i have let Pn Chaw down is the only thing that brings me down. Haiz...i hate myself for putting myself in this position! Argh..

SPM here i come!

Today is the big day of my life. Its like the big reveal, the end of a long journey, its the finishing line and the results will be announced very soon. With my mum accompanying me to take my results, all i kept telling myself was to be grateful and satisfied. Well i went out about 10 after watching the finale of The Amazing Race Asia which Jo Jer and Zabrina who hails from M'sia WON!!!!...on my way, i thought of some Gospel songs to calm myself down"blessed by your name...."

i woke up rather early at around 7.30. SO, to avoid myself from thinking to much, i turned to my computer..haha.on9ing early in the morning...SO what did i do on9...blogged and then heard songs on You Tube..mostly inspirational ones like " I believe" and "Gemilang" to lift my spirits high. Well, then ah Leow and Bing Jian called me..chatted with them actually managed to calm myself down. After all, i am a chatterbox.

At the school hall, we like waited like mad for so long for our results. Anxious ...crazy ....OMG.....and it was only about 11.30 when i got my results. Well at first Mr Hee came out informing us of the very few who did so WELL in SPM that the reporters wanted to interview them. First named called.. scoring so well that he was the top in Perak this year is Ch'ng Dao Zen with 13 A1's. Then ...Calvin Nga(12 A1's) , Liew Xue Ming(12A1's)..well they really deserved it..then came the 11 A1's..kah wai..sheng fei . leow...yik hoe..yew yang...show de yang.leong chee fai....OMG..den no more.

This was the time when true madness rised to the peak. Each of the remaining few looked at each other..me at Hoe..den at zhi chong..sei gan...but the nerve freak was truly crowned to Bing Jian. OMG he har..really freaked out...so scard that he din get 11 A's ...OMG...must calm down...he really berharapan besar..and we all were like...TENangkan diri..then he even asked me for Pn Ooi(Bm teacher)'s Hp number and insisted that i lend him my phone to use...haiz..suan lar.....coz Pn Ooi's hp is 016..mine is 017 ..and that bing jian is Digi geh ..still wan to use my phone..really har...never mind lor..lend la...he so scard..hope that can tenangkan and make him feel better mar..

den talk har talk har.. quite some time passed. and to be honest, i told zhi cong...sudah lama cakap..cash banyak gone lor.....OMG..den only got to know bing jian also sama sama 11A. (10 A1 1A2)...haiz..tak apa lar..good for you..continued waiting.

After a while Mr Hee called out some names and called these people to come forward to take photo with reporter as these lucky guys got 10 A's and above. (Blah..blah..blah...blah...)after quite some time i heard my NAME..shocked..amazed..hooray..did i hear wrongly OMG lor..praise the Lord! went forward and mr hee said these names are the guys who got 11 A's.....haha..not bad lar..must have missed out chinese i guessed..nevertheless..happy and satisfied!!!! GRATEFUL!!!!...

i scored 11 A1's and 1 B3 for chinese. To me, its more than amazing jor.Its like a blessing...more than i ever expected.GRATEFUL+thankful..haha This is like a dream come true.....ENOUGH is enough..i am satisfied..haha...Mr hee asked those to take photos right? group photo ....but me and shao kang did not take and went to the canteen ..we both agreed that getting 11 A's is not a HUGE or AMAZING achievement...let the others have chance to shine..thanks ya shao kang for being with me that time..really appreciate it!

and of course some scored well and some faired alright. Some missed a few subjects and some went empty handed...well....just continue to GAMABTE ar..oh ya ..KKC got 11A's(campur A1 n A2) again, its my destiny to get B for chinese..i say its a family curse+sumpah as my sis also the same takdir..oh well,...i can live with it!

I am like crazy mad calm..can rest jor..haha....thanks for all my friends' support out there! Your prayers are answered !Mr Yip's(form teacher) retirement tomorrow..so all S1 guys must BERI MUKA!!!>.haha

The wait

the wait has been almost crazy for me. i dunno why but the butterflies are keep flying in my stomach till now. To depart myself from this uneasy situation, all i had to do is watch TV and yes, i watched TV til around 2 o'clock. I also thought that by doing some sit-ups it may make me tired..so i did some ...all i wanted is to have some peace in my mind.

This, i managed to achieve until i laid onto my bed and OFF the lights went. Thoughts kept flooding into my mind. A plethora of questions kept popping out into my mind disrupting my earlier peace. And so i kept telling and pacified myself by saying" Don't be greedy."" What you get is what you are responsible of"" satisfaction!!! " I am a fighter". Well, believe it or not , i told that to myself a few times and i even looked at the mirror and told these to my reflection in the mirror.

Despite behaving bizzare, i need to realize the fact that this is a race against myself and not against others. Writing this post needs to remind me later that no matter how it turns out, fate has been decided but I MUST never give up on my dreams.

Its now roughy 2 hours before 10. In a matter of time, fate is gonna be revealed. All the best. Thats all i can say now.

Fight till the end!!!

to all SPM and STPM guys and gals:

Bro and sisters....This week(STPM out on Tues, SPM on Thurs) is gonna be blimey a roller coaster ride for us. So, we gotta stay really strong and fight till the very last end minute!!! yO!!! WE CAN MAKE IT!!!!(gotta chanel the Pets spirit!!!!!) Let us just harvest the fruits of our labour. We are gonna flourish....right??..haha...again my fingers are still crossed...hehe..

Lots of luck !!! May our guardian angel be by our side...OMG!!! Like kate always says in Jon and Kate +8....Holly Cow!!!!..haah